Whence Gays Can Marry, The Apocalypse Cometh

I have a pretty active Facebook page, full of various likes, friends and a few games that I play to pass my time, but clicking on a link that George Takei had posted threw me for a loop, but once I realized it was just a comedic bit, it helped to soften the blow that I thought was going to be more Gay Bashing and Homosexual Hatred.  I was surprised.  Here’s the link so you too can watch:  The Ultimate Anti-Gay Marriage Ad.

I know I’m not here to tell people off, but this is what many so-called Christians think is going to happen…  The heavens are going to rain down fire and brimstone and destroy civilization as we know it.  It not going to happen.  Gay marriage is legal in Britain.  Gay marriage is legal in Sweden.  Gay marriage is legal in much of the United States…  Has there been an apocalypse?  Are we doomed in the eyes of the Lord?

Personally, I think not.  No one has the right to force his or her beliefs upon another person.  No one has the right to enact laws to force people to believe in an idea that is morally obtuse or socially irresponsible.  The refusal of Civil Unions or Gay Marriage is one of those ideas that help us stand for what is truly an equal footing.  There are homosexuals in the military who fight for the freedoms straight people have, but when it comes to those of us who love our life-partners and want to spend the rest of our lives with her, then we can’t!  This is the exact point I’m trying to make:  LezBeProud Episode 1.

I am Transgender!  I am Female!  Because I am this way, I am scrutinized in society for being different.  I may look and act different than someone who is not me, doing the same things I do:  drive the car, shop for clothes and groceries, walk to the mailbox.  We do the same things.  We make difficult decisions and casual choices everyday, just like everyone else!  If I am cut, do I not bleed?  If I am hurt, do I not feel pain?

Why do all of these people, who claim to be devout Christians (of whatever Christian sect), want to force their beliefs and their convictions upon the rest of us?  It’s far too easy to blame others for their religious persecution, because they believe it to be God’s Calling, or their religious right– turning the masses of heathens into Christians– and opening up space in Heaven for them to call Home.  I was Christian before I was Transgender!  I know about all of these things, but the Holy Scriptures have helped me to understand specific concepts that are very out-of-date.  The Holy Bible seems more a book of Moral-Based Stories around the lives of those Jesus and the Lord had devoutly touched.  “Take the good path.”  “Do unto others …”  “Listen and take the advice of your elders.”  “Don’t judge lest ye be judged.”  “Love thy neighbor.”  Where did the devout Christians go wrong?

Mass media and spin-off religious sects tend to pull the focus away from Love and Kindness to Blasphemy and Hatred.  It really makes me angry to see a religious jihad against anything LGBT.  Yes, I did say “religious jihad”.  That’s what it seems to be, more and more in the media, in the laws those Christians vote into power, forcing us who are allied and friends of our LGBT family to vote against such hatred.

We fight your wars.
We live with you in the cities, towns and farms.
We deliver your packages and mail.
We are helpful to you at Walmart and Sears and JCP and Kohl’s.
We wash your cars and clothes.
We care for your children.
We teach your children in schools.
We drive the streets as you do.
We eat at the same restaurants.
We dance and have fun at the same clubs.
We exercise and work out, just like you do.
We haven’t invaded, we were here all along!
It’s just now that you’re starting to see us for the first time!

Why is it that you’re afraid of us?  We’re not going to impose the same restrictions that you’ve unthinkingly imposed upon us.  That’s not the right thing to do.  Being Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual or Trans (transsexual, transgender) does not rub off or is ever contagious; it is the state of our being that gives us the right to oppose the Social Normalcy of Male and Female gender roles.  We are not a religious sect or fad.  We have our Atheists and Christians.  We have Buddhists and Hare Krishnas.  We have other religions as well, but we don’t persecute someone for being weird:  we embrace their compassion for being unique, individual!  It is our lot in life to accept the uniqueness and individuality that everyone possesses, not just those of the LGBT community!

To us:  Everyone is Equal.  That’s the way God intended!  That’s what the Constitution of the United States intended!  As members of One World Society, we are ALL equal.  All of us!

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For the Ubiquitous Ugliness that Belies the Incorrigible

I think there’s a time and a place for everything.  It is the best thing that can become whatever we feel is necessary in our lives, the most important of all things, that of working through friendships and relationships, and taking it all in to deduce what’s right and just to make the best of things.  If I’m wrong, tell me.  If not, then allow me to continue…

I have been in this situation since last September (2012) and have been working to a culmination of various things, hoping that my decision is true and just for what I believe to be the crowning factor in what’s been a lie for over 20 years!  Nothing I have done or said to anyone has really been to hurt them, but to enlighten them to the fact that I’m pursuing a drastic change of lifestyle and demeanor. I never wanted those I considered my friends and family to turn their backs on me, snub me like a murder convict or as the “Scum of the Earth”, but that’s what happened when I told my former landlord, my former fiancee and a few (whom I considered) of my closest friends.  I felt like just abandoning life, running for the closest place I could to get away from everyone, and take my own life. …

I refused!  I told them, in my own way that I am just a human being.  I feel just like YOU!  I hurt just like YOU!  I bleed just like YOU!  I want my human rights just like YOUYOU’RE giving me nothing but anguish, hating me for my views and telling me off like I’m some kind of circus or sideshow freak!  I’m sorry that I’m not Lobster Boy or the Bearded Lady!  (ALL of these sideshow “freaks” were HUMAN, TOO, with FEELINGS and FAMILIES!  It was NOT their fault that YOU exploited them for YOUR sick and twisted amusement!)

Where have I gone wrong?  What have I done to deserve this kind of treatment?  I keep asking the same damn questions and I keep coming up with the same conclusions:  not a damn thing!  I know I’m just having problems with certain people and that they happen to get their facts tangled, then blame me for their misdirection.  It makes me feel like they’re trying to sabotage any relationship (friendship or business relationship) what we may have.  I struggle every day with acceptance and understanding for my acclimation and transition, but when that challenge is itself challenged, I tend to be defensive and unwilling to listen to anything these other people say– nothing– and I usually tune them out (or hang up on them, whichever is more convenient).

It kills me that there’s a bunch of ignorant and belligerent people who believe society is the way everything should be.  It also bothers me that there’s too many people who also think we have a binary gender system.  Not anymore!  All forms should have a list of choices for a person’s Gender:  Male, Female and Other!  This way, you don’t have to put yourself into the general binary gender system.  Why are there so many who fear us?  I’ve not done anything to anyone calling themselves Male or Female, nor have I caused them any harm.  I don’t really care what you call yourself, but I am a woman and I am that way because it’s not about the sum of my parts, but how I perceive and identify myself.  You no longer have control and I believe that’s what frightens you:  your society keeps telling you you’re doing the right thing, when obviously you’re not!

But how does my gender identity frighten you, when it’s not about you and how you feel?  “I think, therefore I am,” is a quote from some historical great thinker.  It makes some sense, but it belies a much deeper meaning than just those five words.  “I exist because I think.” … “I exist because I can think.” … “I exist because I choose to think.”  The fact that individuals can understand being is knowing and that knowledge is power should take to the streets and assist us in our personal struggles, where I believe that’s the stuff the flock is looking out for that makes them afraid of those who are like me, my brothers- and sisters-in-arms, and our supporters.  Why should they be afraid of us?  Sweden and the UK, even Ireland and Russia, Thailand, Japan, China and Canada all have transgendered and intersexed citizens, why can’t we?  Why do we not rate among the World Society?  As US citizens and many of us hold professional positions, vote, and pay taxes, why can’t we get the care, the medications and the services we need to help us become whole?

Fear.  That’s all it is…  Simple fear.  The politicians are scrambling to quell the onslaught of our LGBTQ community, though a healthy smattering, 30 to 35%, cross-dress or are closet homosexuals.  Another 2 to 5% are hiding their transgender status.  Yet another 1 to 3% are stating one gender when they are truly intersexed.  It all comes down to societal fear, and the yearning to be a generic normal.  Newsflash:  there is no generic or societal normal anymore!  I am a single member of this great nation, the US of A, and I am a single member of the LGBTQ community, through no fault of my own, and I am proud to be who I am and not the sum of my parts!

Knowledge is Power.  This has been blasted into me since I was old enough to read, write and comprehend!  I know many of us are Christian in some fashion, and that some of us are of other religious systems, but what bothers me most:  I see many of you harboring a deep-seated resentment or hatred for your fellows in religion.  Don’t call this a Holy War!  God made His flock in His image to help us to mend what we’ve broken, love unconditionally, and to never hate and envy our neighbors!  If you’re not religious, then it’s all to perpetuate love and kindness to all!  Karma can be well-deserved in any form it chooses, Good or Bad, benefiting or hurting whomever had made their choice.  I consider myself Wiccan and Christian, as both are symbolic of a Greater Love and Affinity for Life!  I would hope you, as fear-seekers, would just stop being prejudicial against what you don’t understand, open your minds and hearts to what we’re trying to explain, and allow our message to help guide you to be more understanding to what we are asking, as a whole, ending the violence and anti-LGBTQ policies and bills that you are trying to pass into law.  Allow us our freedoms and we will show you just how much like you we truly are!

Consider this.  I blog when I have been unjustly blasted, either verbally or physically, by someone I thought I could trust.  I cannot stand idly by and let people do this to me, nor can I delve into the possibilities that would compromise our collective safety, but I will notify and work out the pain, hurt and transgressions I feel, openly and with those of you who can honestly say “Hey, I know You!  I’ve been there. … How can I help?”  I am working through an exceptionally tough time right now and I want anyone who reads my blogs to, at least, have some kind of awareness that I am in need of assistance.  Nothing is needed more than to get “my transition on”.  I have few options, minimal funds and a loving wonderful family (family, friends and associates whom I consider my extended family) who are struggling as we all are in this horrendous economy.

I am looking toward alternatives for getting what I need for my transition, but I am seriously struggling in every aspect:  naysayers, non-believers and the prejudiced.  I put them out of my mind and take matters into my own hands (non-violently, of course).  I need more than just assistance:  I need more caring and loving friends, colleagues and acquaintances.  We all do.  My brothers- and sisters-in-arms do as well, and there’s almost no help for us medically…  Why?  Politicians and hateful/prejudicial Christian fear-mongering.  That’s all it is.  If someone at work is part of our LGBTQ community, then pull her aside, say something kind to her, and rally behind her when she needs it most.  Take up your pens and write to your state representatives to start more LGBTQ initiatives; help us get he medical treatment we need, the health assistance we have the right to, and bolster us when we fall.

I just want all of us to be happy and healthy.  Why can’t we?

New Found Inspiration

I recently learned of Amy Lee’s contributions to many parts of life, and her singing is over the top, and not promoting sex and sexual imagery; it makes me proud to listen to Evanescence knowing women will never be exploited (not even Amy Lee herself) to further her music.

I know, in my heart, that her message comes through her music, whether it’s a heartfelt sorrow for not knowing her late sister that well, to the epilepsy foundation she is the international chairperson of, it all comes down to never compromising to get heard and never letting your fans down because of following the record labels means creating with the greatest common denominator:  sacrificing quality, sacrificing integrity and sacrificing the message that’s in your soul that has to come out!  No one should have to bow down to the record companies to “sell” your music:  it should come from the heart and soul, have a greater meaning than just the lyrics, and show others that you care and believe in your own talent and music.

I have been listening to Evanescence’s “Evanescence Deluxe Version” released in 2011 on Spotify and I am mostly in tears as I can feel her soulful rock pull soothingly at my heartstrings.  She makes me feel so much more than what I am, what I look like, and to make me feel even more female than I ever have.  Don’t get me wrong, there are a handful of songs that I truly love from Abba, but those are more love, single, and first 70s genre anthems than those of Amy Lee which makes me feel so much more than the sum of my parts; Abba tends to be upbeat and happy, but Evanescence tends to be darker, deeply meaningful and completely soulful.

Don’t think of me as being a dark and moody person, though I can be when I feel the need to, I just feel that there’s more to life than just being moody and dark.  I also feel loved and happy, but Abba’s only for those times when I feel kind of down but not depressed, just kind of under the weather…  The Evanescence I listen to a lot of the time, just to get a fresh perspective on the things that I create, the things that I need some insight on other than what I think it should be, and for those things that need more attention.  It’s not that there’s anything wrong with Abba or Evanescence, there are many more groups and musicians that inspire me.  There’s so many that I am loathe to list them all.

We all struggle to find, not only a uniqueness that is truly our own, we often times forget to be ourselves.  Standing in the world, feet planted firmly in the realization that all that makes us great rests inside, somewhere…  Some of us discover it rather early, and some catch it or even a small glimpse later in life.  That’s perfectly normal for us to discover all that potential, no matter where we find it, and put forth a brave face and carry on with our lives, protected by the knowledge that we, all over this great world, are a part of something much larger than each of us individually:  we are a global society!

Inspiration comes in many different forms.  A quick and distorted guitar riff; a barely-audible odd sounding note in a piano chord; a harmony of woodwinds on a snowy clear night; the cacophony of ducks and swans early at the park; the way the leaves wave in the light morning breeze; listening to a happy baby’s laugh; having such a deep full-body laugh for a few minutes bringing tears to your eyes…  I could go on.  Inspiration can come from aromas and smells; touches of various textures and textiles; the taste of something sweet or something horrible, barely palatable; colors in a crayon box; pleasant or disturbing visuals on YouTube that make you think and make you feel.  Art, no matter the outlet, no matter the canvas, no matter the audience you’re trying to reach, is absolutely positively nothing without it being discovered first.

Salvador Dali has extreme talent, and was not exactly popular.  Once he found his muse (using drugs at the time), he became more inspired throughout the rest of his artistic career.  (I am not condoning drug use, but he had used it for inspiration.  How do you think he came up with the melting timepieces?  Just saying…)  Picasso also had these bouts of ill health and was prescribed certain drugs to help him cope.  He, too, had his shift in design and style based on those same drugs to make him feel better…  Music inspires other musicians; Beethoven, being a great composer, lost his hearing slowly, and in the latter portion of his life was completely deaf.  There were two famous composers who would listen to Beethoven’s works, and became inspired partly due to his compositional prowess, but because of his not being able to hear his own work!

I am inspired from almost everything I come in contact with.  Now that I am no longer with my 13-year former fiancee, I feel more alive and free than I ever have!  Don’t get me wrong, I do love her still, but I just wish she would look past her personal confusion and into the very heart of me; looking deep inside us both, for the friendship and caring we shared for those many years.  I know she will, but not until she comes to grips with her own demons.

It is these things, and my former fiancee, that help to inspire me in much of what I do.  It’s just so hard to look at people, watching them struggle because of the blatantly obvious or sweating all of the little stuff, when they’re watching their lives, and in a good number of cases, their loves slip through their fingers.  Even these things offer inspiration, but I know there’s going to be something good soon; something never experienced before, and it will come to all of us, once we believe we can accept ourselves as we are, and to rebuke society for their forceful stereotypes.

Be you.  Be free.  Get inspired!

~Robynn

Being Normal in an Abnormal World

This statement goes without saying.  We live in a bubbling mass of different people, each with his and her own objectives and likes and dislikes, enough to know that there are things that are taboo in many of the world’s stages.  Something here in the US is taboo in the Middle East.  Something in the Middle East is taboo in Japan.  Something in Japan is taboo in Russia.  And on and on and on…

The World Stage.  This is the measure we are ruled by:  not just those in our own countries, but by those of other countries and societies.  The United Nations is a governmental body housed and peopled by members of many of the so-called civilized nations of the world, working together for a common goal:  peace and prosperity for all mankind!  Much of the time, it’s mired and stuck in decades past accomplishments or recent global losses of member nations or the senseless violence that distort the media outlets into rumor mills or worse.

We are already part of that when we are born into this World Stage.  We grow up and interact with everything from cellphones and internet-ready devices, to computers, laptops, palmtops, netbooks and tablets!  We use this technology to talk to people whom we want to have as friends, only to find out that those people are just the uninformed, technologically-impaired, self-absorbed and you want to unfriend them as quickly as you can.  You find the device or app you’re using doesn’t allow that– there’s no [IGNORE] button on Facebook, there’s no [DUMP] button for your e-mail account, there’s no [UNPLUG] button on your RSS feeds– and that’s just one part of the whole!

All too often I observe young mothers and fathers with small children handing them their cellphones (like iPhones or Samsung Galaxys and the ilk), and letting them play games or watch Barney or Spongebob or The Wiggles on them.  Letting them watch for hours as they get their mobile chores done, picking them up into their car seats and dropping them to their feet to walk along, still clutching the tiny colorful screens, listening to “I’m Barney!  Let’s play!” and still trying to maintain some semblance of a ‘normal life’ with children!

I have two lovely wonderful boys.  Their mother and I mutually adopted them to a loving family in Boston!  I want to make a point:  I know what joy it is to have children.  The pain of minor complications with a caesarean section.  Holding them for the first time and hoping (and praying) you’re doing it the right way!  Bonding with them and crying because of the love you’re giving them, knowing they’re going to be well taken care of!  I am human; there’s nothing going to ever change that!

We’re all bombarded with mass media, multimedia (the television is exactly that!!!) and other locations of news or so-called news, reporting whatever they feel is right and what people need to know!  We feel obligated to tell you everything that’s happening in the world so that you can make an informed decision about what to do today, to eat for breakfast/lunch/dinner, clothes to wear, shoes to buy, car to drive, wife to love, number of children to have, type of job, and on and on and on…  (Doesn’t your brain hurt from all that drivel?)

Anyway, I’m off track here somewhere…

To get back on track:  We’re all a part of the Human Race, placed upon the World Stage, given lines that seem oh so unique, automatic and meaningful, and stuck in relationships that seem to revolve around something frivolous.  Only when you realize you can change parts of this, is when you can truly become your own version of NORMAL, and the world you live in is the stranger!

You’re no longer the weird one!  You’re being normal in an abnormal world!

Congratulations!  You’ve finally accomplished that which you wanted to do for such a long time:  YOU WON!